The Doll theory - "feminine psychology" explained - By AdTheBad

 
The Doll theory (& letters from the dad of AdTheBad)

It seems that I have not been entirely honest either with myself or with the members and staff of the forums I so joyfully 'discovered' from 2011 onwards.

Eddie Willers' post  The First Of My Parents To Pass  fired up a neuron and I remembered something which had been long forgotten.

My own dad was a retired police constable living at the other end of England when he died 2 years ago at a good age. I had rejected him as a youth as I believed he had rejected me as a child when he left his family of six kids and wife. I was angry and lost and the following is the final letter he sent to me. My reply was basically to tell him to fuck off and never bother me again with his insane ramblings and he never did. I thought I had burned all correspondance years ago in youthful rage and grand gesture posturing but 'Eddies neuron' sparked a race to my mums house where I have an old trunk in the attic and voila!...his letters!

I recalled the letter but not the content and remembered the disquiet and rage at 'reality' being distorted.

Bear in mind that these a written mid 1980's when I was a youth and he'd been gone half of my life.

This is the final letter that had no other supporting writing with it. I'd be interested to know if this is a 'Dad of AdTheBad' origional or if anyone has seen it elsewhere. He was a well-read man and it could be an extract from another work but Google doesn't seem to think so.

To quote Homer: Doh!


The Doll theory.

These observations are meant principally for the younger elements of the male gender who, if not already, most certainly will in the future meet the eccentric phenomena of the X-factor or the female strain of humanity.

Poets, philosophers, 'Romeos' and the love-lorn have been puzzled, perplexed,tormented, tantalised, impoverished or demented by these creatures. Thier caprices, tempers, tears and taunts have been a mystery since the beginning of time. There is no specy so incomperehensible to the mind of man as the woman. No other form of life on the planet weaves such a complicated pattern of emotions or runs to such unfathomable depths.the folowing known as 'The Doll theory' may go some distance along the road to thier partial understanding.

The female from its entrance into the family is cossetted, pandered, listened to and pampered from the moment it draws breath. It is educated from day one in the assumption of its self-importance and of it taking its place as the central position in its family unit. Everything revolves around her. Her embryotic ego is continually fed with inordinate attention by its mother. As soon as those frail arms are able to do so it is given a doll. A harmless enough play-thing maybe but innocent although it maybe this is her first object lesson.

With this toy she is taught to lavish care, affection, spite and control over her immediate environment. She learns to exercise authority by cajoling, promises, blackmail and chastisement. Just as a boxer uses a punchbag to hone his punching ability, so the young female learns to develop the muscles necessary for control and getting her own way. In fact she learns to accept it as a natural expectation from anything in her power or sphere of influence. As the little monster grows older she is given more dolls and a 'Teddy bear'. Now this is the introduction of the male element in her life and the one factor upon which she learns to exercise the more punative elements of her character. If Teddy does not do as he is told then the whole gamut of embryonic female emotions can be vented. She can practice being cross, pleased, bullying, corporal punishment, sulking, tears, depriving of affection, and the general exercise of 'Teddy must do as he is told' vocabulary.

This development of the fantasy aspect of her emotions teaches her how to pretend. Pretending to be pleased or upset, pretending she is hurt or offended, pretend laughter or pretend tears, pretend pleasure or pretend horror. This social learning is reinforced by her mother who will treat the rest of the family in the same ways. The more observant the specimen becomes the more she will inwardly learn and digest new variations of central control or 'getting her own way'. This is very important because as the central figure of attentions she must not only get her own way but she must be 'seen' to be getting her own way.

As the years roll by this self awareness, self perception, and self importance becomes a vital characteristic of her personality. To disagree with her is smiting at the root of her authority and it is an offence against the thrice holy nature of her ego. This is reinforced by the mothers influence and the aiding and abetting of indulgent fathers who have already been battered into submission by thier wives. To be fair, it is very difficult for the male who has been exerting his mental and physical efforts in the work-place to put up more than a token resistance to the verbal abuse of his wife. He has already learnt what happens to 'naughty teddies' (a) from his mother and if this was only partially learnt it is heavily reinforced by (b) his wife.

She must be obeyed or at least seen to be obeyed.

It is seen from these facts that when boy meets girl irrespective of whats going on in his mind, in actual fact the girl is inspecting another 'teddybear'. She may not realise this within herself and in fact would strenuously deny the suggestion. Its so congenitally and socially inbred into her that its as instinctive as a cat chasing a mouse. The cat may not be hungry or particularly relish mice but it will chase it all the same. The male just triggers off a spasm in the brain of the female which has its roots in the preditory and acquisitive nature of the woman. Just as a black-hole in space absorbs and swallows stars that come within its influence so the female will automatically seek to absorb what personality the male may have and ingests it with her own.

Just as a recalcitrant teddy-bear will be beaten or hurled across the room in annoyance and distaste so the dewy-eyed boyfriend will be discarded if he demonstrates any tendency to the females almighty and indomitable will. The female, due to its nature, will not tolerate even the mildest form of dissent and her self-importance is such that if the male is not with her he is against her no matter what physical or social intimacies may have taken place earlier. She can alternate between like and distaste, love and hatred as easily as turning on a tap of water.

Because she has been encouraged to rely upon instinct, emotions and feelings, cerebral reasoning is wasted effort.

They see what they want to see and all those hours playing with dolls and watching thier mothers has taught them a matchless vocabulary and an unnerving instinct for the male jugular vein. When he apologises to her because she has chosen to be or pretend to be upset, the male is only reinforcing her ingrained self belief that she must be obeyed. She knows no such thing as parity, she knows only dominance. This Prima Donna factor is continually reinforced by brothers, uncles, fathers and grandfathers who, lacking moral fibre and backbone have surrendered and live the lives of a slave to the female tyrrany.

In fact there is a male element that enjoys being the "teddy-bear" because his self-esteem is flattered by her (vis???rous) attentions. "Little girls are made of sugar and spice" she is taught and goes through life believing, until she is still a little girl in an ageing body who must have her own way, or else "watch out 'Teddy'!".

Do not say you have not been warned.


Thanks dad. Sorry about the angry stuff.